Saturday, September 6, 2008

Don't be concerned about being disloyal to your pain by being joyous.

At what point does Image via Wikipedia
Don't be concerned about being disloyal to your pain by being joyous.
– Pir Vilayat Inayat Khan, Alchemical Wisdom

It's hard to let go of pain when your heart is breaking. Hard to see through grief and loss to a time when you can feel something other then the sharp edges of hurt, or the cold dullness that lingers when you can't hurt any more.

But, what about the day when there is a clear thin line of light on the horizon? When someone makes you laugh, really laugh, for the first time in forever? Or, the first time you find yourself enjoying a moment? Finding relief from the crushing weight of sadness is a relief, but it can also bring anxiety and guilt. Do I have the right to feel happy again? Who am I to enjoy this? What will I be when I am no longer defined by this grief, this depression?

Don't be concerned about being disloyal to your pain, wherever you are in the grieving process. Whatever loss you have suffered, remember that you deserve to be happy and free from suffering. Suffering is a normal and unavoidable part of life, but that does not mean that we need to prolong it, or use it as penance or punishment against ourselves.

Gratitude can create a window, an opening to the world outside of grief.

Embrace a moment of mindfulness now.
Take a deep breath and look around you for one small thing that you can feel gratitude for. Take another breath, and breath in that thing, pull it deep inside you and let it fill the empty recesses with the grace and beauty of that one true thing.

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